Friday, December 31, 2010
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
A few things I want to do in my life are:
Work with LGBT young people
Have a family
Create a home
Have semi-harmony between my future pack of dogs, cats and children
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
I love my technology addiction, it amuses me greatly during things like traffic jams and family occasions.
I love my new panda hat but thats not really me, just an expression of my silliness.
I love my feistiness. It can get me into a lot of trouble but I love who/what I love passionately and I'm prepared to fight or just get lippy to protect them.
I love my listening abilities. I love my open-mindedness. I love my beliefs.
I love this chocolate cake ^_^
Friday, December 24, 2010
Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
So there ya go, I'm an optimistic bugger. Get used to it :P
Thursday, December 23, 2010
30 Days of Truth
Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself
Monday, December 20, 2010
Day 30 – Anything LGBT you’d like to end this on :]
Happy holidays :]
Day 29 – SHOUT SOMETHING! IT CAN BE HAPPY AND ABOUT PRIDE OR ABOUT WHY YOU HATE HOMOPHOBIA!
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Day 28 – Write a letter to someone. It can be a coming out letter or a letter regarding how you hate their homophobia or whatnot
Hi :) I'm you in just a few years time. Hard to believe isn't it? It's a tough time for you right now. I wish I could say it gets better immediately, but sometimes things need to get worse before they get better, so that you really appreciate the good times when they come.
You're on the verge of discovering so much, and all I can tell you is do follow your gut instincts. It will lead you to an incredible part of yourself, something that you will dispute, and something that will change your whole world. But it is you, and we're nothing if not a survivor right? I wish I could tell you your faith will get you through. You're going to continue on your journey to find what you really believe in. The Catholic Church will only keep disappointing you. Please do not hate yourself. It's the religion you were brought up in, you had no reason to ever doubt it and it is their loss.
Gill this is a time of huge confusion for you. The guy you're sitting with, he's going to bring you nothing but heartache, but your heart already knows that. August is going to be a particularly hard time for you with relation to him, and it will be a very long time until you can talk about it to anybody. Keep going, there is a reason to everything, no matter how cruel it may seem.
You're gonna get there hun. Your next birthday will be so much happier, I promise you. For your own sake, accept things you can't change. You can't change the fundamentals of who you are but you can change what you do with who you are.
You're an amazing person.
Love, your 21 and 3/4 year old self.
X x
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Day 27 – Your favorite LGBT blog/tumblr/site
Friday, December 17, 2010
Day 26 – Your favorite gay joke (we all need to laugh at ourselves)
What second date?
What does a lesbian bring to a second date?
A U-Haul
:P
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Day 25 – The LGBT slur you hate most or if you’ve taken back a slur and used it as a definition, ie queer or fag
Monday, December 13, 2010
Day 24 – The stupidest argument/comment you’ve heard about gay people or an LGBT issue
Hate is a choice. Love is natural. Your actions will define you.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Day 23 – An LGBT image that makes you cry or makes you angry
I don't give a rats ass what religion you follow or what your God says, religion is a personal CHOICE and shouldn't be shoved down the throats of others. I'm sure if the Catholics (as this is the only major religion I know relatively well) bothered reading their Bible a bit more closely they'd see that hating your neighbor is also wrong and that God loves everybody.
This makes me cry:
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Friday, December 10, 2010
Day 21 – Political LGBT issue that is closest to you or affects you most
By Evelyn Ring
Friday, May 08, 2009
CHILDREN raised in same sex families do just as well as other children living with heterosexual parents, an Irish child expert has claimed.
Co-director of the Children’s Research Centre at Trinity College Dublin, Prof Sheila Greene, said there was no evidence that children in lesbian and gay families were experiencing the kind of problems that some people had predicted.
Prof Greene said: "Children within gay and lesbian families are not any more or less gay, they are not confused and they don’t suffer from mental health problems to any greater or lesser extend than children being reared by a biological mother and father."
She said debates about who should and should not parent children in Ireland must be informed by scientific evidence rather than unfounded assumptions, and sometimes biased beliefs, about the outcomes for children in lesbian and gay families.
The professor was one of the guest speakers at a national symposium called Marriage Matters for Lesbian and Gay People in Dublin, organised by the National Gay and Lesbian Federation.
She said it was now widely accepted that of the many reasons why children develop emotional or behavioural problems, the sexual orientation of parents did not appear to be one.
But Prof Greene said being raised by lesbian and gay parents was not plain sailing and she urged parents to be aware of the challenges that their children might face.
It was already known from recent Irish research that there was a high level of homophobia and bullying among young people.
"If children are teased because they wear glasses or because their parents were separated, it was reasonable to expect that children may be teased because of the sexual orientation of their parents.
"This will mean that children may have bad moments, like any others, not that they will be psychologically scarred or suffer from mental health problem. The important issue is that parents must be tuned into the needs of their children," she said.
Meanwhile, well known British-based human rights and gay rights campaigner, Peter Tatchell, said the Irish Government’s proposed civil partnership legislation was a big mistake and an insult to same-sex couples.
"It is a rejection of marriage equality. Separate laws for gay people are not equal laws," said Mr Tatchell.
The campaigner urged the Irish Government not to go down the same road as Britain with its flawed system of civil partnerships.
This story appeared in the printed version of the Irish Examiner Friday, May 08, 2009
Read more: http://www.irishexaminer.com/ireland/snkfcwmhmh/rss2/#ixzz17iYqujgG
Now why can't the government read this kinda stuff, the proven research, instead of listening to the people lining their pockets.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Day 20 – Maureen or Joanne? (Or your favorite LGBTQ show or queer-positive show)
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Day 19 – Butch or Femme?
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Day 18 – Something about the LGBTQ community you don’t understand or have a question about
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Day 17 – Your first experience with an LGBT organization or event (Day of Silence, Pride, etc)
My first 'face to face' encounter with the LGBT community was over a year later, when I'd figured out I was anything but heterosexual and had picked apart my cost little straight life to take a look at why I was so deeply unhappy. It was post Pride 2008, and I had found the youth group BeLonG To while website hoping (like channel hoping only online). I was utterly terrified to go to their Sunday group. I had waited till my family was out of town so I didn't need to put my pathetic lying skills under undue pressure. I shook the entire bus ride to town and the whole walk to the community center was rushed, my head watching my feet and navigating a part of town I wasn't all that familiar with. Four or five hours later after a flurry of names and faces, hugs and so much information I was totally convinced that I was going back the next week. Right after I came out to my parents. I don't do things by halves ;)
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Day 16 – A picture from your first LGBT relationship or of your first LGBT crush
Friday, December 3, 2010
Day 15 – Your favorite LGBT quote
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Day 14 – Your favorite LGBT song or artist
How To Survive a Lesbian Relationship Break-Up
Difficulty: Hard
Time Required: Can Take a Year or More
Here's How:
Recognize what has happened.
The first thing you might be feeling is, "I can't believe this is happening!" Shock and denial are normal in the early stages of recovery from a break-up. You keep thinking you'll wake up from the bad dream or that your lover will return. This is the first step in the grieving process. Once you begin to believe that it's really over, you're ready to move on to the next step of healing from a break-up.
Next you might feel anger toward your partner.
Good, this is the second step of grieving. At this time, it is a good idea to get away from your partner. If you live together, move out or go stay with some friends. Too many lesbian couples continue to live together after they break up. If you can't afford to move out, go stay with a friend for a while. You need to separate to get a clear head. Don't drive by her house or ask friends about her new girlfriend, you'll only torture yourself.
Get support.
Call on your friends. Your friends, not your mutual friends. At this time you need someone who is going to take your side. You don't need a reasonable voice at this time. You need a friend who will nod in agreement at every horrible thing your ex has done. She'll tell you how wonderful you are and how much better off you are without her. There's plenty of time to be reasonable in the future. Right now you need to vent.
Mourn, but don't wallow.
Feeling sad is normal. Yes, it's okay to cry, scream and feel pity for yourself. But don't allow the situation to turn you into a bitter human being. Give yourself up to a year to grieve. If after that time you're still welling up with tears at the thought of her, it's time to see a therapist. Something else is probably going on to cause your sadness.
Get Closure.
Say the things to her that you need to and leave it at that. If she won't see you face to face, send her a letter. Beware of e-mail, where you can write something regrettable and impulsively hit send. If you choose to communicate by e-mail, be sure to wait 24 hours before sending off your letter.
No Rebounds.
It sure can be tempting to enter into a new relationship to help you forget the old one. But if you don't give yourself time to heal and reflect on what happened with the last one, you're bound to repeat the same patterns.
Let it all out.
Get your feelings out in healthy ways. Write them down, make a painting, write a fantastic break-up song, listen to great break-up songs, go for a run. Let it out in what ever way feels best to you. Avoid turning to drugs or alcohol. They will only make the situation worse.
Look at yourself.
What went wrong with the relationship to cause it to end? Every relationship is a two-person dynamic. Try to identify what part she played and what part you played. If you take ownership of your role, you'll be less likely to repeat the same mistakes in your next relationship. Beware playing the blame game. Getting angry at yourself for your mistakes will not help. You just want to recognize what you did so the next time you're aware of your dynamic.
"That which does not destroy us will make us stronger."
Remember this. This is a hard time and you WILL get through it. Look at this as an opportunity for growth and to test your strength as a human being. When it feels like too much, be sure to call on those support systems.
"Let go and let God."
You can't control what another person does, but you can control how you react. Pray, meditate, read inspirational stories, whatever will get you through. Remember others have been through this and came out on the other side and you will too. Breathe in and out. It will get better.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Day 13 – Your favorite LGBT role model/celebrity
My LGBT role models change quite regularly, like most things with me! There are a few that have remained constant however. As a collective I have huge respect and admiration for BeLonG To Youth Services. Partly because of the high standards of youth work they maintain no matter what is thrown their way, partly because they have created such a strong name and image for themselves within the LGBT community. When I qualify (ie. when I grow up) I want to work with an organization like them.
On a broader scale I admire the It Gets Better Project founder Dan Savage and all the people who have contributed to the project. Such is my admiration and belief in the project I had this tattooed recently:
Monday, November 22, 2010
Day 12 – Your favorite LGBT movie (or one you’d like to see)
It's the harrowing true story of Brandon Teena, a trans man in America in the late 80's and early 90's.
My second is RENT
I got so upset watching Boys Don't Cry (I was quite hysterical, it took a half hour to calm me down) that RENT was put on, to cheer me up. It definitely worked, and there were tears throughout, once you break the seal thats it! It is my most watched LGBT film.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Day 10 – What does marriage mean to you?
Practically marriage is about security. It's a step you take, when combining your life with somebody you love, to protect your assets should anything ever happen to the other person or to you. It's a step you take to protect the children you have together. It's a piece of paper that affords you some nice tax breaks and a good status in society. And as much as people say that these things don't matter it is only to a very few. The majority of people do think about these things and want them, secretly or not.
Romantically I think marriage is about promising another person that you're gonna try your damnedest to make your relationship work, in good times and bad times, because you love them. It's a commitment to the life you've both planned and created together.
No matter how marriage is defined or what it means to people I think it is completely ridiculous to claim that LGBT people fighting for the right to marry is destroying it's sanctity. If anything is destroying the sanctity of marriage it's divorce! I hope that someday I will have somebody that I want to marry, and when that time comes that I will have the right to marry her. I will continue to fight for my future happiness, and the security of my future family. I'm only human after all.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Day 9 – What do you think about LGBT Pride? Is it helpful or hurtful? Encouraged or unnecessary?
LGBT Pride is an important event, one that encourages the community to get out and celebrate being themselves. The day that LGBT people don't receive any form of harassment for their sexuality is the day that Pride will start to become unnecessary for me. But until that day I believe we should be out there, every summer, to keep showing the world who we are.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Day 8 – What do you think the closet or being closeted means to you?
n.
1. A cabinet or enclosed recess for linens, household supplies, or clothing.
2. A small private chamber, as for study or prayer.
3. A water closet; a toilet.
4. A state of secrecy or cautious privacy: Two days before the election, the candidate suddenly came out of the closet and denounced the proposed law.
To enclose or shut up in a private room, as for discussion: closeted themselves with their attorneys.
adj.
1. Private; confidential: closet information.
2. Being so or engaging only in private; secret: a closet proponent of a tax increase; a closet alcoholic.
3. Based on theory and speculation rather than practice.
Thats the dictionary definition of the closet. For me, being in the closet is a lifetime thing. I'm always half in, half out, judging each situation, making sure that it is safe for me to come out and show all of me. Sexuality is a small part of who we are but also such a big part, and it will continue to be a big part for as long as LGBT people face prejudice for just being themselves.
Being closeted has a different meaning for me, it means being forced to stay in the closet, either from fear within yourself (but this fear has to come from somewhere external, we're not born afraid), or from an openly negative environment.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Day 7 – How your parents took it or how you think they might take it
They've met a few of my partners over the past 30 months, liked and disliked, but treated them all with the same respect they treated any boy my sister or I ever brought home. They've stood up for me against ignorant family members and adore my girlfriend.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Day 6 – Did you face any problems regarding religion?
I'm still a spiritual person, I believe in different things, but I won't be getting over the dissapointment of being let down by the Church of my childhood anytime soon.
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Day 5 – Thoughts regarding inner turmoil about your sexuality; Did you have any? Did it escalate to self-injury or suicidal thoughts?
I'm still not sure if my turmoil about my sexuality is what led me to become suicidal. It was a combination of a lot of things. I was also (and to an extent still am) an over-eater for the purpose of trying to comfort myself.
Friday, November 5, 2010
Day 4 – The first person you came out to and that story
The next time I ventured out of the closet I was more sure. I was 19, and it was during my 6 months of 'finding the problem' I'd taken after splitting up with my long term boyfriend. I don't remember the exact details, I was shit scared to actually say it. I was out on a drive round town with a friend and my little sister. I made some comment after we'd passed The George pub and my sister asked me outright if I was gay, to which I replied yes, I was. It felt like forever waiting for her response, but in fact it was merely a few seconds. Again, I don't remember her exact words but it was something along the lines of 'Cool.'.
It was around that time that I joined BeLonG To, the LGBT youth services in Dublin. Soon after I came out to my folks and slowly to everybody else in my life.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Day 3 – How old were you when you knew? What was that like for you?
I tried to tell friends when I was 15 but they didn't understand so back into the closet I went. When I was 16 and doing my Transition Year one of the boys in our inter-school play had a crush on me. I was flattered, nobody had ever looked at me like that or wanted to hang out with me. So we dated but it never felt right. We broke up a few months later and he is still a good friend of mine. I was set up with another boy when I was in my final year of secondary school, a friend of a friends boyfriend. We dated for 18 months, my longest relationship to date. It was easy, we got on well and just plodded on. But I knew it wasn't what I wanted.
I finished secondary and went to university, a good deal away from home, but I was commuting. Away from the routine and regime of school I fell under very quickly and got very depressed. Once I'd been put on anti-depressants I began to realise that I was leading my then boyfriend along and I wasn't happy in our relationship. It killed me but I broke up with him. I spent the next 6 months figuring out what it was I wanted.
And the rest is for another blog.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Day 2 – Did you have any experiences as a child that might have foreshadowed your sexuality?
To be honest, I led a very sheltered childhood. I always knew I was different but I didn't have the world knowledge to put words on how I felt.
Monday, November 1, 2010
Day 1 – Your sexual orientation or gender identity. Be creative in your definition.
My gender identity is something I've been pondering for a few months, what it means to be a woman or a man, gender-queer, trans, or just in between. I am biologically a woman and many of my behaviours and tenancies follow that of what society has taught women to be. However as a gay woman I don't always agree with the 'sight quietly and look pretty' default that my gender has been assigned. So I'm a modern woman. A woman who isn't equal to males but wants to be treated with the same respect and given the same chances and opportunities a bio-male would get.
So this became a rant. In short I'm a kinda girly, outspoken, short hair, jeans loving gay woman, who's not afraid of the word dyke, dislikes the word lesbian and is pissed off at society's gender definitions.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Been following a friends blog for a while now and I'm really enjoying her 30 days of LGBT blog series. So I am stealing ^_^ I'll never manage 30 consecutive days so I'll just try to complete it in my own time.
Kudos to her, check out her blog: http://doyouwannaknowhowigotmyscars.wordpress.com/
Day 1 – Your sexual orientation or gender identity. Be creative in your definition.
Day 2 – Did you have any experiences as a child that might have foreshadowed your sexuality?
Day 3 – How old were you when you knew? What was that like for you?
Day 4 – The first person you came out to and that story
Day 5 – Thoughts regarding inner turmoil about your sexuality; Did you have any? Did it escalate to self-injury or suicidal thoughts?
Day 6 – Did you face any problems regarding religion?
Day 7 – How your parents took it or how you think they might take it
Day 8 – What do you think the closet or being closeted means to you?
Day 9 – What do you think about LGBT Pride? Is it helpful or hurtful? Encouraged or unnecessary?
Day 10 – What does marriage mean to you?
Day 11 – Your favorite LGBT book (or one you’d like to read)
Day 12 – Your favorite LGBT movie (or one you’d like to see)
Day 13 – Your favorite LGBT role model/celebrity
Day 14 – Your favorite LGBT song or artist
Day 15 – Your favorite LGBT quote
Day 16 – A picture from your first LGBT relationship or of your first LGBT crush
Day 17 – Your first experience with an LGBT organization or event (Day of Silence, Pride, etc)
Day 18 – Something about the LGBTQ community you don’t understand or have a question about
Day 19 – Butch or Femme?
Day 20 – Maureen or Joanne? (Or your favorite LGBTQ show or queer-positive show)
Day 21 – Political LGBT issue that is closest to you or affects you most
Day 22 – An LGBT image that makes you smile
Day 23 – An LGBT image that makes you cry or makes you angry
Day 24 – The stupidest argument/comment you’ve heard about gay people or an LGBT issue
Day 25 – The LGBT slur you hate most or if you’ve taken back a slur and used it as a definition, ie queer or fag
Day 26 – Your favorite gay joke (we all need to laugh at ourselves)
Day 27 – Your favorite LGBT blog/tumblr/site
Day 28 – Write a letter to someone. It can be a coming out letter or a letter regarding how you hate their homophobia or whatnot. You don’t have to send it.
Day 29 – SHOUT SOMETHING! IT CAN BE HAPPY AND ABOUT PRIDE OR ABOUT WHY YOU HATE HOMOPHOBIA!
Day 30 – Anything LGBT you’d like to end this on :]
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Fuck yeah lesbians!
This really resonates with me, especially in my chosen career of youth work. I often feel I'm too 'gay-centric' and feel guilty about that. But if I don't speak out for the people like me then how is that encouraging to the young people I'll work with? Love yourself and all your '-centrics'. Sometimes it's okay to be selfish.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Ahh relationships
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Love, loss and lesbian drama.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Sunday, May 2, 2010
How did we get here?
I'm fortunate to have received some great techniques for stopping myself, pausing everything, and bringing myself back to the present moment. Sometimes it works better than others, but for the most part it calms me down, something someone like me, who over thinks, needs a lot!
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Friday, April 23, 2010
Late night music emotions blog
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Sunday, March 28, 2010
-St. Augustine
--Ingrid Bergmen
--Ibn Abbad
--Janos Arnay
--Bliss and Cerney
--Robert Burns
--Ralph Block
--F. Scott Fitzgerald
--Andre Gide
--Robert Heinlein
--Jaka
--Antoine de Saint-Exupery
--Robert Sexton
--Unknown
--Sir Hugh Walpole
--Erich Fromm
--Henry David Thoreau